Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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