Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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