so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Randomize
