my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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