their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
