I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Randomize
