We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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