That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize