STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
