How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
