can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
