yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
