I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I need moral support for this bender
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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