I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
