I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Randomize
