Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
