just tell him i said nine months
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
