he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
