Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
