My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize