i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
You smell like stripper and shame
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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