I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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