Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
