On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Can you repeat that, but with context?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
