how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
