Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i think im in europe. pls send help
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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