this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
