Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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