Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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