I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I think I won the penis lottery.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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