then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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