arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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