I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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