Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
