I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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