I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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