Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
