Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
