I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
