Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Randomize
