went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Fuck appropriateness.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
