How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
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