i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
