I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
