C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
