Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
