I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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