Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
