I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
