no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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