He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
